Friday, March 02, 2001

Forget about Reality TV--if you really want to be entertained, tune into Reality Check Television, brought to you by the capital markets.

Survivor:
Outwit, outplay, and outlast your fellow dot com entrepreneurs in the funding desert. Every day, another contestant gets voted out--and onto the pages of F*ckedCompany. Take the Downsizing challenge to win immunity from Chapter 11 for another week. Whoever is the last man standing wins the grand prize: a bridge loan with 200% warrant coverage.

Temptation Island:
Tune in to see what happens as struggling entrepreneurs are tempted by the siren song of B2C and B2B (back-to-consulting and back-to-banking). Watch as contestants break down in tears when confronted with videotapes of McKinsey recruiting events. If you're still your own boss 6 months later, you've won.

The Mole:
One among them is a management plant. Try to spot the mole as our intrepid team of dot-bomb employees works together to steal company laptops and dodge successive rounds of downsizing.

Big Brother:
24-hour, round-the-clock coverage of employees locked in a sea of cubicles. Watch as they try to hide their forays onto Monster.com, HotJobs, and beapimp.com from their eagle-eyed managers. See the 2-hour lunch breaks, and the office supplies stuffed into khaki pockets. Marvel at the extreme boredom of watching the same gray wall, hour after hour, without any new stories on ESPN.com.

So I Used to be a Dot-com Millionaire:
Nah, too depressing.

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