Saturday, September 30, 2006

Grumpy And Dopey On The Supreme Court

A recent Zogby poll revealed the following about the American people:

3/4 of Americans correctly identified two of Snow White's seven dwarfs
1/4 of American can name two Supreme Court Justices.

74 percent were familiar with the Three Stooges — Larry, Curly and Moe
42 percent could name the three branches of the U.S. government — judicial, executive and legislative

23 percent were able to identify "American Idol," Taylor Hicks.
11 percent could name the Supreme Court Justice confirmed in January 2006, Samuel Alito.

I'm reminded of the classic SNL sketch, "Common Knowledge" (alas, not on YouTube, though this is).

Of course, while some might see this as yet another sign of the apocalypse, I see it as an indication of an opportunity. Make political science as entertaining as Snow White, the Three Stooges, and American Idol, and maybe the numbers would be different.

My old history teacher in high school, Mr. Cady, used to spice up his lectures with sexual innuenedo ("The life of the medieval peasant was long and hard...much like the anatomy of many of your friends, Bethany.") and by making it relevant to his students' lives.

While doing so today would probably land him in jail, perhaps alternate methods would work. And I'll bet there's a huge business opportunity for someone to shake up the textbook industry with "History Idol."

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Quote Of The Day: The Price

"There is a price for everything you want in life. And the price is always paid in advance."
--Steven Barnes

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Cocaine Marketing

This is frakking brilliant. Redux Beverages is completely sold out of their new energy drink, Cocaine, after spending $37.50 on marketing (they delivered a case of the stuff to the New York Post, which immediately wrote a story about the brand).

What does it taste like? Who knows! All you need to know is that it has 350% more caffeine than Red Bull, and that it's called "Cocaine!"

This is a Hot Pink Cow in spades.

The frightening thing is that the founders may have gotten the idea from Max Barry's satirical novel, "Syrup."

In it, the hero creates a hot new cola with a six-word pitch:

"New cola. Black can. Called Fukk."

Are you crazy enough to market a product named after an illegal substance or obscenity? Maybe not, but you can certainly think about ways to use this tactic in your business.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to hurry up and file for a trademark on Crystal Meth Energy Bars.

Monday, September 25, 2006

No Sex Please, We're British

With apologies to my fellow English speakers on the Eastern side of the Atlantic, I just have to relate this piece of research:

A recent survey of 10,000 English men revealed that 48 percent actually fall asleep during sex.

The amazing part is that particular factoid is only part of a larger musing on the age-old question of why men fall asleep after sex.

It turns out that sex releases high levels of prolactin, a hormone which induces weariness when injected.

Even better news for you insomniacs out there, masturbation only releases 25% as much prolactin as intercourse, so you now have a scientific basis for requesting sex from your partner. You can thank me later.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Yet Another Sign Of Being Old

This morning, when I read this post about the most embarassing fashion trends of the past 25 years, I found myself asking, "What about all the fashion atrocities from the 60s and 70s?"

Then I realized that 25 years ago was 1981. Damn I feel old.